More sounds of martial law…

Thousands of Troops Are Deployed on U.S. Streets Ready to Carry Out “Crowd Control”

By Naomi Wolf, AlterNet. Posted October 8, 2008.

Members of Congress were told they could face martial law if they didn’t pass the bailout bill. This will not be the last time.
Background: the First Brigade of the Third Infantry Division, three to four thousand soldiers, has been deployed in the United States as of October 1. Their stated mission is the form of crowd control they practiced in Iraq, subduing “unruly individuals,” and the management of a national emergency. I am in Seattle and heard from the brother of one of the soldiers that they are engaged in exercises now. Amy Goodman reported that an Army spokesperson confirmed that they will have access to lethal and non lethal crowd control technologies and tanks.
George Bush struck down Posse Comitatus, thus making it legal for military to patrol the U.S. He has also legally established that in the “War on Terror,” the U.S. is at war around the globe and thus the whole world is a battlefield. Thus the U.S. is also a battlefield.
He also led change to the 1807 Insurrection Act to give him far broader powers in the event of a loosely defined “insurrection” or many other “conditions” he has the power to identify. The Constitution allows the suspension of habeas corpus — habeas corpus prevents us from being seized by the state and held without trial — in the event of an “insurrection.” With his own army force now, his power to call a group of protesters or angry voters “insurgents” staging an “insurrection” is strengthened.
U.S. Rep. Brad Sherman of California said to Congress, captured on C-Span and viewable on YouTube, that individual members of the House were threatened with martial law within a week if they did not pass the bailout bill:
“The only way they can pass this bill is by creating and sustaining a panic atmosphere. … Many of us were told in private conversations that if we voted against this bill on Monday that the sky would fall, the market would drop two or three thousand points the first day and a couple of thousand on the second day, and a few members were even told that there would be martial law in America if we voted no.”
If this is true and Rep. Sherman is not delusional, I ask you to consider that if they are willing to threaten martial law now, it is foolish to assume they will never use that threat again. It is also foolish to trust in an orderly election process to resolve this threat. And why deploy the First Brigade? One thing the deployment accomplishes is to put teeth into such a threat.

I interviewed Vietnam veteran, retired U.S. Air Force Colonel and patriot David Antoon for clarification:

“If the President directed the First Brigade to arrest Congress, what could stop him?”

“Nothing. Their only recourse is to cut off funding. The Congress would be at the mercy of military leaders to go to them and ask them not to obey illegal orders.”

“But these orders are now legal?’”

“Correct.”

“If the President directs the First Brigade to arrest a bunch of voters, what would stop him?”

“Nothing. It would end up in courts but the action would have been taken.”

“If the President directs the First Brigade to kill civilians, what would stop him?”

“Nothing.”

“What would prevent him from sending the First Brigade to arrest the editor of the Washington Post?”

“Nothing. He could do what he did in Iraq — send a tank down a street in Washington and fire a shell into the Washington Post as they did into Al Jazeera, and claim they were firing at something else.”

“What happens to members of the First Brigade who refuse to take up arms against U.S. citizens?”

“They’d probably be treated as deserters as in Iraq: arrested, detained and facing five years in prison. In Iraq a study by Ann Wright shows that deserters — reservists who refused to go back to Iraq — got longer sentences than war criminals.”

“Does Congress have any military of their own?”

“No. Congress has no direct control of any military units. The Governors have the National Guard but they report to the President in an emergency that he declares.”

“Who can arrest the President?”

“The Attorney General can arrest the President after he leaves or after impeachment.”

[Note: Prosecutor Vincent Bugliosi has asserted it is possible for District Attorneys around the country to charge President Bush with murder if they represent districts where one or more military members who have been killed in Iraq formerly resided.]

“Given the danger do you advocate impeachment?”

“Yes. President Bush struck down Posse Comitatus — which has prevented, with a penalty of two years in prison, U.S. leaders since after the Civil War from sending military forces into our streets — with a ’signing statement.’ He should be impeached immediately in a bipartisan process to prevent the use of military forces and mercenary forces against U.S. citizens”

“Should Americans call on senior leaders in the Military to break publicly with this action and call on their own men and women to disobey these orders?”

“Every senior military officer’s loyalty should ultimately be to the Constitution. Every officer should publicly break with any illegal order, even from the President.”

“But if these are now legal. If they say, ‘Don’t obey the Commander in Chief,’ what happens to the military?”

“Perhaps they would be arrested and prosecuted as those who refuse to participate in the current illegal war. That’s what would be considered a coup.”

“But it’s a coup already.”

“Yes.”

http://www.alternet.org/rights/101958/t … age=entire

Women, are you voting!!???

Just askin’…

This ever so short time until the historical November Election is a good reminder of the women’s suffrage movement–

[and if you haven't seen Iron-Jawed Angels yet, you should definitely see it-- I heard it's excellent! But I haven’t a clue where in Knoxville I would get to see it…. And I do not have HBO!]

Did you know that the movement was the first to picket the white house?  Did you know that it was inspired by the women’s suffrage movement in Great Britain, which taught and inspired Gandhi when he was studying law in Britain?  Definitely an amazing & inspiring tale–pass it on!

And really think about this—-
WHY WOMEN SHOULD VOTE

This is the story of our Grandmothers and Great-grandmothers; they lived only 90 years ago.

Remember, it was not until 1920 that women were granted the right to go to the polls and vote.

The women were innocent and defenseless, but they were jailed nonetheless for picketing the White House, carrying signs asking for the vote. Many shunned by their families and many lost their jobs.

During the first night in jail…………….

(Lucy Burns)

…………and by the end of that night, they were all barely alive. Forty prison guards wielding clubs and their warden’s blessing went on a rampage against the 33 women wrongly convicted of ‘obstructing sidewalk traffic.’ They beat Lucy Burns, chained her hands to the cell bars above her head and left her hanging for the night, bleeding and gasping for air.

(Dora Lewis)

They hurled Dora Lewis into a dark cell, smashed her head against an iron bed and knocked her out cold. Her cell mate, Alice Cosu, thought Lewis was dead and suffered a heart attack. Additional affidavits describe the guards grabbing, dragging, beating, choking, slamming, pinching, twisting and kicking the women.

Thus unfolded the ‘Night of Terror’ on Nov. 15, 1917, when the warden at the Occoquan Workhouse in Virginia ordered his guards to teach a lesson to the suffragists imprisoned there because they dared to picket Woodrow Wilson’s White House for the right to vote.
For weeks, the women’s only water came from an open pail. Their food–all of it colorless slop–was infested with worms.

{Alice Paul)

When one of the leaders, Alice Paul, embarked on a hunger strike, the men tied her to a chair, forced a tube down her throat and poured liquid in to her until she vomited. She was tortured like this for weeks until word was smuggled out to the press.

http://memory.loc.gov/ammem/collections … soners.pdf

So, refresh my memory…. Some women won’t vote this year because–why, exactly? We have carpool duties? We have to get to work? Our vote doesn’t matter? It’s raining?… did you even register TO VOTE yet??? I guess we won’t talk about being an ‘informed voter’. That is another topic.

The articles about HBO’s new movie ‘Iron Jawed Angels‘… and it’s graphic depiction of the battle these women waged , just so I; all women– could pull the curtain at the polling booth and have our say… reminded me of Women’s History Class in College– and my own living history growing up in the DC area. I am ashamed to say I needed this reminder of how hard fought my right to vote was– and I didn’t bleed once, someone else did.

All these years later, voter registration is still my passion. It has never been just a right I have, it is also a responsibility and priviledge. Even if sometimes is inconvenient.

‘What would those women think of the way we use, or don’t use, our right to vote? All of us take it for granted seemingly, not just younger women. I am hoping your American right and obligation becomes valuable and priceless ‘all over again.’

It was also jarring to recall that Woodrow Wilson and his cronies had tried to persuade a psychiatrist to declare Alice Paul insane so that she could be permanently institutionalized. And thank God that doctor refused. Alice Paul was strong, the doctor said, and brave. That didn’t make her crazy. The doctor admonished the men: ‘Courage in women is often mistaken for insanity.’
It was also due to many courageous women like this– [women in your families pasts] — that contributed to another cause that needed addressing– The Civil Rights of ALL MANKIND! And their right to have a voice also!

Please, if you are so inclined, pass this on to all the women you know.
We need to get out and vote and use this right that was fought so hard for by these very courageous women. Whether you vote democratic, republican or independent party - remember to vote.

History is being made. Set an example for your children and grandchildren. It is their future we are talking about.

A Bush Brings Down Lehman Brothers… Anything They Touch Becomes Shit

EM at The Grievance Project sent this to me the other day and I need to share, because this is the first and only time I have heard this mentioned. The Bush Family has been involved with countless banking failures and business losses (or theft.. and many other types of dubious behavior).

One Bush was involved with financing the Nazi war machine. Another Bush introduced the death knell “New World Order” and “NAFTA” to us. Dubya has made it possible to totally ravage our entire economy and somehow brainwash half of America. One Bush brother (Marvin) was in charge of Security at the World Trade Centers (convenient, huh?) and “Jeb” and “Dad” tag-teamed Big Money by being instrumental in the break down of one of the world’s oldest banking institutes.

The family is either the unluckiest bunch or the most evil. I bet evil.

Jeb is apparently the most vile and corrupt of the group (at least of those still alive).

What is Jeb Bush’s role in the Lehman Brothers meltdown?

Lehman Brothers was founded in 1850. The firm managed to get through the Civil War, WWI, and WWII, the Great Depression, and the attacks of September 11, 2001. Yet after hiring Jeb Bush in late August of 2007, the firm suddenly goes belly up in a year. It also should be noted that in 2006, George H. Walker IV was also hired by Lehman Brothers.

Now, let’s take a walk down memory lane, shall we?

Neil Bush: The brother of the current president, son of the elder Bush, and another do-nothing embezzler was part of yet another huge financial meltdown. This was known as the Savings and Loan scandal (S&L). From Salon:

Long before that, in the late 1980s, Neil Bush made bigger news for his controversial role as a director of Silverado Savings and Loan, which collapsed and cost taxpayers roughly $1 billion. (Federal regulators accused Bush of various conflicts of interests, but he was never charged. A civil suit against Bush and other Silverado officers was later settled for $26.5 million.)

Also from WaPo, a great summary of Neil’s sleazy life, including the S&L scandal:

In the late ’80s and early ’90s, Bush embarrassed his father, George H.W. Bush, with his shady dealings as a board member of the infamous Silverado Savings and Loan, whose collapse cost taxpayers $1 billion.

Now back to Jeb:

From Mother Jones: Early Years, Medicaid fraud, his own S&L, and allegations of drugs:

After graduating from Texas University, Jeb Bush served a short apprenticeship at the Venezuelan branch of Texas Commerce Bank in Caracas before settling in Miami, in 1980, to work on his father’s unsuccessful primary bid against Ronald Reagan. Campaigning for Dad was hardly a paying job. But Jeb was about to learn that being one of George Bush’s sons means never having to circulate a résumé.

In the next few years, financial support flowed to Jeb through Miami’s right-wing Cuban community. Republican party politics and a series of business scandals — including Medicaid fraud and shady S&L deals — were inextricably intertwined. A former federal prosecutor told MJ that, when he looked into Jeb’s lucrative business dealings with a now-fugitive Cuban, he considered two possibilities — Jeb was either crooked or stupid. At the time, he concluded Jeb was merely stupid.

…

So, might it be possible that Jeb has some serious questions to answer about what he did at Lehman Brothers, who his “clients” were, and so forth? After all, setting up a hedge fund to launder or embezzle funds seems to be a family specialty

B’Man: Read the entire article at at-Largely

Jeb Bush is wickedly tainted… just like the whole lot of them.

Freaky Sex Friday: Rich GOP Thief Gets Retribution

GOP delegate’s hotel tryst goes bad when he wakes up with $120,000 missing

He met her in the bar of the swank hotel and invited her to his room. Once there, the woman fixed the drinks and told him to get undressed.

And that, the delegate to the Republican National Convention told police, was the last thing he remembered.

When he awoke, the woman was gone, as was more than $120,000 in money, jewelry and other belongings.

The thief’s take stunned cops.

“It’s very, very, very rare,” Minneapolis Police Sgt. William Palmer said. “I can think of a couple of burglaries where we had that much stolen, but it’s the first time I’ve heard of this kind of deal.”

In a statement released today, Gabriel Nathan Schwartz, 29, of Denver, put the figure at much less.

“It’s embarrassing to admit that I was a target of a crime. I was drugged and had about $50,000 of personal items stolen, not the inflated number that the media is reporting from an inaccurate police report,” he said.

“As a single man, I was flattered by the attention of a beautiful woman who introduced herself to me. I used poor judgment.”

Contacted by the Denver Post Monday, Schwartz declined to speak on the record. In the statement released today, Schwartz said he would decline further interview requests.

The haul included a $30,000 watch, a $20,000 ring, a necklace valued at $5,000, earrings priced at $4,000 and a Prada belt valued at $1,000, police said.

Schwartz is a single attorney and a fixture in Colorado Republican politics. Hewas one of the state’s delegates to the convention this month in St. Paul.Reached by phone at his law office Monday, Schwartz said that because the case still was under investigation, “I think at this point, I don’t want to make a comment on it.”

During the convention, Schwarz wasn’t shy about talking to the media. In an Associated Press article about Sen. John McCain’s acceptance speech, Schwartz was quoted as saying that as far as oratorical skills go, McCain “has more experience in his little pinkie” than Democratic nominee Barack Obama.

In an interview filmed the afternoon of Sept. 3 and posted on the Web site LinkTV.org, Schwartz was candid about how he envisioned change under a McCain presidency.

“Less taxes and more war,” he said, smiling. He said the U.S. should “bomb the hell” out of Iran because the country threatens Israel.

Asked by the interviewer how America would pay for a military confrontation with Iran, he said the U.S. should take the country’s resources.

“We should plant a flag. Take the oil, take the money,” he said. “We deserve reimbursement.”

A few hours after the interview, an unknown woman helped herself to Schwartz’s resources.

The theft happened at the Hotel Ivy, a luxury hotel in downtown Minneapolis. (The Colorado delegation was housed at the Four Points Sheraton, several miles away on Industrial Boulevard Northeast.)

The theft occurred early on Sept. 4, hours after Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin gave her speech accepting her party’s vice presidential nomination. A police report said Schwartz told officers he met a woman at the bar and took her to his $319-a-night room.

“Victim reported suspect made victim drinks, told him to get undressed, which is the last thing he remembers,” a police narrative said. “Upon waking, victim discovered money, jewelry gone; total loss over $120K.”

A police report notes the crime occurred between 4:22 and 5:46 a.m., and Palmer said investigators believe Schwartz was drugged, although he declined to discuss details.

Aside from the watch, ring, necklace, earrings and belt, Schwartz also reported a $1,000 purse or wallet, a $1,500 cell phone, $500 in cash and a couple of rings worth $50 had been taken.

Alister Glen, general manager of the Hotel Ivy, called the theft an isolated incident and said no hotel personnel were involved.

“I don’t know if I’m at liberty to discuss it,” he said. “It’s still under police investigation.”

Schwartz was a supporter of former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani, donating $2,300 — the maximum individual donation allowed by law — to his presidential campaign last year, according to records from the Federal Election Commission.

After Giuliani dropped out, Schwartz switched his allegiance to McCain, and records show he donated $2,300 to the Arizona senator’s campaign in April.

In biographical sketches of Colorado’s delegates published in the Rocky Mountain News, Schwartz said he was single, didn’t have any pets and most admired Colorado Secretary of State Mike Coffman, “as he has served our party for many years and has served in the military.”

He said his idea of a “dream ticket” was McCain and Mitt Romney, the former Massachusetts governor.

On the Web site for his Denver law practice, Sandomire & Schwartz, the lawyer describes his experience as a civil and criminal lawyer and points out he is a regular guest on “Colorado State of Mind,” a public affairs program produced by Rocky Mountain PBS. The show, according to its Web site, says it gathers “opinionated and passionate people from across the state” to discuss a wide range of issues.

In his interview on LinkTV, Schwartz seemed opinionated and passionate.

He said an attack on Iran was needed to protect Israel, and he offered how it could be accomplished through “strategical airstrikes.”

“Hopefully, just bomb the hell out of them from the sky. No troops,” he said.

Schwartz was asked if he had a message to the protesters who filled the streets of downtown St. Paul.

“Get a job,” he replied.

Yes, “Get a job”, you worthless piece of shit (even tho I wish for total death and destruction and carry $120K around on me at all times.

This is the reason why we are fucked in America, rednecks. And you Bushies McInsanies just gobble this nshit up.

h/t EM @ The Grievance Project found at TwinCities.Com

Do You Have A Grievance? Call E.M.

This guy rocks and as I told him this morning, I don’t believe there is a more ‘respectful’ way to get in someone’s face.

Visit The Grievance Project and see if you would like to jump on board. He is certainly worthy of a B’Man’s Patriot Watch recognition:

Michael J. Elston
McGuire Woods, LLP
Washington Square, 1050 Connecticut Avenue, N.W., Suite 1200
Washington, District of Columbia 20036-5317
Telephone: 202-857-1700
Fax: 202-857-1737
melston@mcguirewoods.com

Dear Mr. Elston,

I have been researching the conduct of various attorneys in the service of the government of the United States, whether that conduct is a violation of the rules of professional conduct with which each such attorney must comply and authoring factual allegations of conduct that establish violations of the applicable rules of professional responsibility, including Alberto Gonzales, Kyle Sampson, Harriet Miers, Lisa Murkowski, John Yoo, Mark Everett Fuller, Monica Marie Goodling, Thomas W. Hartmann and, now, yourself. In addition to the allegations in the complaint recenty filed against you in Virginia by CREW, your conduct in the firing of the United States Attorneys also violated several of the rules of professional conduct of the Illinois, Kansas, Missouri and Virginia Bars. These actions also raise a substantial question as to your honesty, trustworthiness and fitness as a lawyer.

I’m interested in your response to the criticisms that your conduct in your handling of both the firing of the United States Attorneys and hiring practices at DoJ violated your ethical obligations as a member of the Illinois, Kansas, Missouri and Virginia Bars.

E.M./The Grievance Project

Meet the Bloggers Aug 22 & 29th!

Dear Supporter,

We at Meet the Bloggers are very pleased to tell you that Michael Moore, the Academy Award-winning activist filmmaker of SiCKO and Fahrenheit 9/11, will be our special guest this Friday, August 22 and again on August 29. The show starts at 1pm ET and we’ll be joined by bloggers Liliana Segura (AlterNet) and Cheryl Contee (Jack & Jill Politics), as well as nationally syndicated author and blogger David Sirota. Watch Mike talk with host Cenk Uygur about issues he covers in his new book, Mike’s Election Guide 2008– “With John McCain admitting that he has no idea how to use a computer,” Mike said, “we’ll be providing Sen. McCain a step-by-step tutorial on how to turn one on, log onto the internet, and send an e-mail.”  As if having Michael Moore on two shows wasn’t exciting enough, we’re also featuring a special one-on-one segment of the show on August 22 in which I will talk to Mike about the progressive impact of his films and books. And to top it all off, you can suggest text questions and video questions  for Mike and enter our contest. The best questions for Mike will win a special prize of one of Mike’s trademark hats (signed by Mike himself!), or an autographed copy of his new book Mike’s Election Guide 2008, a funny and informative tool for progressives.  Submit a question for Michael Moore

Go to Meet the Bloggers now and submit text questions and video questions  for Mike. Since this is your show, you can also submit suggestions for future guests you’d like to see, or issues you’d like discussed. Meet the Bloggers — where you’ll find all the intelligent, in-depth analysis you won’t get on any of the weekly corporate-sponsored shows. See you Friday, 1pm ET/10am PT! Don’t miss a minute of the next two episodes of: Meet the bloggers!

Yours,

Robert Greenwald
and the Brave New team

P.S. On previous episodes of Meet the Bloggers, we’ve featured Sen. Harry Reid, Rachel Maddow, Arianna Huffington, and Bernie Sanders. You can watch the entire episodes  here.. . We are located at 10510 Culver Blvd., Culver City, CA 90232 and info@bravenewfoundation.org

Message from Mike:

                                

They all come home Winter Soldiers…

I ran across this first young man while researching the ‘winter soldier’ topic. I admit that it made my heart flash-back to those I love that were ‘Winters from Nam’.  Hence, I wanted to share these. They are important. Important in the aspect that while finding them and watching them, I also read many of the posted comments about them. The most upsetting ones were obviously from very young people. They were ignorant… and scary because of the ignorance. They called these ‘heros’ liers and chickens… etc. How sad, how terribly sad. Why– because these soldiers went– they went to serve!! they are brave, they are patriots… no matter the bottom-line reason for them enlisting… they went. BUT then, to experience death and actions taken against their internal moral code… to be done for a lie… for greed,  for all the wrong reasons to have them deployed– this, yes this is what they are against. Not the ‘defending the country’ part-This first ‘hero’… spelled it out right from his heart. And to me he is the ‘common factor’ in the representation of the average U.S. Soldier.

                 

Darrell Anderson was deployed to Iraq with the Army’s 1st Armoured Division in the spring of 2004. Darrell served most of his time in Baghdad where he was wounded by a roadside bomb after serving for 7 months. Facing the possibility of a second deployment to Iraq, Darrells conscience kept him from returning to the military. After witnessing the abuse and killing of Iraqi civilians and being ordered to fire on an automobile containing Iraqi civilians, Anderson concluded that the war is wrong.  

August 11, 2006 Iraq Veterans Against the War Press Conference at the Arlington Northwest Memorial. Seattle, Washington www.ivaw.net Sgt. Ricky Clousing U.S. Army interrogator. A wave of soldiers are refusing to participate in the U.S. war against Iraq.
GI resisters are getting considerable support from other soldiers and veterans.
Following the press conference, a group of Iraq Veterans Against the War, along with former GI resisters and other supporters went with Ricky Clousing to Fort Lewis, where Ricky surrendered himself to military custody.

[http://www.c-spanarchives.org/library/index.php?main_page=product_video_info&products_id=205390-1&showVid=true]

The above video link is from Cspan and covers 3 hours

My observation while watching this. These soldiers went into a venue that was offered. They arrived prepared and well spoken. Their hearts seemed heavy… heavy from their war experience, heavy from beating their heads against walls… and heavy from maybe thinking this too is a BS meeting– .The Chair of this meeting made me a bit ill in the beginning with her ass-kissing to fellow members etc… and then at the end… she seemed to have an already prepared speech!! And when she stated that ’ those sitting behind you have your backs”… I wanted to throw up!! All of these soldiers are heros to me. ALL of them!

Support Sites!!

Courage To Resist
http://www.CourageToResist.org

The Movie: Sir! No Sir!
http://www.sirnosir.com

Iraq Veterans Against The War
http://www.ivaw.org

Help The Grievance Project Disbar Sampson and Goodling (its a start)

My friend EM at The Grievance Project is carrying forward on his idea of filing grievances against all the crooks who have hijacked America’s justice departments, especially the Gonzales’, now Mukasey’s cover-upped criminal institute. I hope that you will go visit the Grievance project and help any way you feel you can. EM is a patriot and worthy to be on B’Man’s Patriot Watch.

I have had mixed feelings regarding attorneys, but EM (and those he seems to respect, like Jonathon Turley, who I have long linked to and respected myself) is a different breed. I believe he is doing what he can to make real change and I support him (even though he writes above my legalese head, at times).

You all know about AG Mukasey’s horrendous decision to not prosecute Sampson, Goodling, et al.  Although expected, that’s not good enough.  These attorneys are an embarrassment to the legal profession and this country deserves better.  I’ve long had enough.  Have you had enough?

My grievance strategy is based on sound legal theory and can begin to restore some credibility to the legal field.  My concept has also been advocated by Prof. Jonathon Turley.  On an episode of Countdown a few weeks ago when the OIG/DPR report was released, Prof. Turley strongly argued that grievances should be filed against Goodling and Sampson.

Please help me promote this important project.

Hysterical Raisins

Nonnie at Hysterical Raisins does some really funny work. The Grievance Project had a h/t for her and now I subscribe.

Oh, kids! Didya see it? Of course, I am talking about The New Yorker magazine cover! From ABC News:

The sophisticates at The New Yorker have come up with a cover that is sure to get the magazine a lot of attention. Negative attention. From their friends.

An illustration by Barry Blitt depicts Sen. Barack Obama, D-Ill., and his wife Michelle in the Oval Office, revealing their “true” selves: Michelle is in full revolutionary garb, an enormous afro making her look like a millennial Angela Davis, holding an automatic weapon and wearing military pants.

In the cartoon Michelle is giving dap, or fist-bumping, with her husband who is wearing a turban and is dressed in garb perhaps more appropriate for a madrassa in Lahore than the Oval Office.

A painting of Osama bin Laden hangs above the fireplace, where the American flag is being burned.

Well, you know me, kids! I am always here to help out! I don’t want the people at The New Yorker working too hard. In the spirit of fairness, I thought Captain Underpants and his botoxed recipe stealing Stepford lovely wife, Cindy Lou, should have a super-cool cover, too, so I created one! Hey, The New Yorker! You have my permission to use this one….