Preparations: A Country Boy Will Survive

I was out of pocket all day yesterday working on my latest project.


We started the project in the evenings last week. Worked almost every day and finally finished the addition yesterday (I even cleaned up after taking the pic). Paint is BuelahLady’s project (I’ll believe it when I see it). We added a 10′ X 12′ section to my work shop for storage. Since we moved here, we have been renting a large storage facility to keep the crap we couldn’t fit into this house (we moved from a 4,400 Sq Ft place to a 1,500 Sq Ft place). The storage was costing us $45/month and we have been here over 2 years. Do the math. Our bedroom isn’t big enough to hold our king sized bed, so it is in storage, just to get a sense.

The materials for the addition was $600 and a whole bunch of free labor by me and my Father-in-Law (he is 72). But now we can move whatever we need into our own storage, have the big yard sale, and then save the $45/month.

Also, as I mentioned to Kelso, my garden has been putting out. We are canning/freezing as much food as possible (and had a wonderful fresh food dinner with Giant Lima Beans, corn on the cob, squash casserole, tomatoes, cornbread and grilled chicken breast). 3 bottles of Sam Adams to top it all off and I was pooped… slept like a baby.

Today, I start moving (if I can work out the aches and pains in my body).

Now for a little Hank explaining how I will make it through, no matter what (and btw, there isn’t a single thing he sings about that I can’t do):

A Country Boy Can Survive

The preacher man says it’s the end of time
And the Mississippi River she’s a goin’ dry
The interest is up and the Stock Markets down
And you only get mugged
If you go downtown

I live back in the woods, you see
A woman and the kids, and the dogs and me
I got a shotgun rifle and a 4-wheel drive
And a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive

I can plow a field all day long
I can catch catfish from dusk till dawn
We make our own whiskey and our own smoke too
Ain’t too many things these ole boys can’t do
We grow good ole tomatoes and homemade wine
And a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive

Because you can’t stomp us out
And you cant make us run
Cause one-of- ’em old boys raisin ole shotgun
And we say grace and we say Ma’am
And if you ain’t into that we don’t give a damn

We came from the West Virginia coalmines
And the Rocky Mountains and the and the western skies
And we can skin a buck; we can run a trot line
And a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive

I had a good friend in New York City
He never called me by my name, just hillbilly
My grandpa taught me how to live off the land
And his taught him to be a businessman
He used to send me pictures of the Broadway nights
And I’d send him some homemade wine

But he was killed by a man with a switchblade knife
For 43 dollars my friend lost his life
Id love to spit some beechnut in that dudes eyes
And shoot him with my old 45
Cause a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive

Cause you can’t stomp us out and you can’t make us run
Cause one-of- ’em old boys raisin ole shotgun
And we say grace and we say Ma’am
And if you ain’t into that we don’t give a damn

We’re from North California and south Alabam
And little towns all around this land
And we can skin a buck; we can run a trot line
And a country boy can survive
Country folks can survive

Its Clear Now: If McCain Wins, I Need To Move

UPDATE: It has come to my attention that the post does not plainly attribute the author of this essay. I take no credit for its authorship and the link is found below (I read this at World Prout Assembly).

Dear Red States:

We’ve decided we’re leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we’re taking the other Blue States with us.

In case you aren’t aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and all of the Northeast. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of Nuevo California.

To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma, Georgia and all the other slave states. We get stem cell research and the best beaches.

We get the Statue of Liberty. You get Dollywood.

We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom.

We get Harvard. You get Ole’ Miss.

We get 85 percent of America’s venture capital and entrepreneurs.

You get Alabama.

We get two-thirds of the tax revenue; you get to make the red states pay their fair share.

Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the Christian Coalition’s, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms.

Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we’re going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They have kids they’re apparently willing to send to their deaths for no purpose, and they don’t care if you don’t show pictures of their children’s caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq, and hope that the WMDs turn up, but we’re not willing to spend our resources in Bush’s Quagmire.

With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80% of the country’s fresh water, more than 90 % of the pineapple and lettuce, 92% of the nation’s fresh fruit, 95% of America’s quality wines (you can serve French wines at state dinners) 90% of all cheese, 90% of the high tech ind! ustry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools, plus Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Cal Tech and MIT.

With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88% of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92% of all U.S. mosquitoes, nearly 100 percent of the tornadoes, 90% of the hurricanes, 99% of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100% of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia.

We get Hollywood and Yosemite, thank you.

Additionally, 38% of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62% believe life is sacred unless we’re discussing the death penalty or gun laws, 44% say that evolution is only a theory, 53% that Saddam was involved in 9/11, and 61% of you crazy b*****ds believe you are people with higher morals then we lefties.

By the way, we’re taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico .

Peace out,

Blue States

h/t World Prout Assembly

Also, watch this to see why I think so many rednecks are totally ignorant to truth.

If you read here you know that I am not an Obama fan, but these fucking lunatics are embarrassing to me as a redneck. It is a shame that America is so gullible to fall for the storyline (on both sides of the forced equation).

Then, on top of that, we have that ignorant assed Hank Williams Jr singing his special song for the “McCain/Palin Tradition”.

No, Hank. You suck and your idiotic song is a plight on America; for you fuel the idiocy that is The Right. And it is tearing America apart.